“I feel trapped.”

This statement is a common ‘chief complaint’ given by a new patient.

There is a famous experiment done with monkeys. The monkey is placed in an impossible situation and is ‘punished’ no matter what move it makes. Eventually it stops trying and crawls into a ball. Its blood chemistry resembles that found in people with depression or PTSD.

 

 

There are other experiments from nature to suggest animals ‘shut down’ when the situation has no way out for them.

 

People don’t need a psychiatrist to tell them they are unhappy.

They know why they are unhappy –

 

They are doing a job that erodes the soul.

They are in a relationship that is killing them.

They can’t get hold of a job, healthcare, or other resources.

They are unhappy living where they do.

Their hopes were invested in “X” and now that “X” is here, it is a disappointment with no back-up plan.  

 

Leaving the job, getting out of the marriage, moving etc. are the remedies. But the usual response is ‘I can’t. I’m trapped.”

 

What I try to get people to see they are not that trapped. Hell is often locked from within, not from without. In the Tarot Deck “The Devil” has people enslaved in chains – but if you look closely these chains could easily come off if people only paid attention.

 

When we think of leaving a trap, we run the notion by our fears, not by our faith. I quickly hear about the fears why a person can’t change -

There is a mortgage.

I have no money.

I have no where to go.

What will they think of me?

 

Getting out of a trap usually means going into the unknown. It is hardly ever safe or easy. Leaving a trap means being scared of the uncertain and going towards something that may not exist.  Scary.

 

Nevertheless, it is can preferable to staying.

Nothing in life of any worth comes without some sort of price.

 

Of course, many people don’t leave their traps.

 

I acknowledge there are legitimate traps. Robertson Davies wrote everyone needs to recognize the traps they are in and make peace with them.

 

But please make sure your traps are genuine, and staying truly outweighs going.