I have been very angry as of late. It amazes and disappointments me how quickly my anger surges up. I have to be very conscious I don’t go bezerk and act out on it when a wound is rubbed or a button pressed In calm moments I process with myself why I feel so much anger. The suspect list is vast. It ranges from “trivial” things such as work bureaucracy, to real matters like the ignorance and ugliness of the nation.

Some of the leading suspects of my wrath –

Some out of control patients

The GOP

Drivers talking on their cell phones

Bad mannered people, who have learned bellowing works as no one sets limits with them.

Mormons

Fox News

Arizona politics

– and the sheep folks who go along with it all.

My blood pressure rises just to write about it.

Mostly I am mad at myself. I wasn’t on the ball on some things, and the time/energy to correct these bungles will be tedious, painful, and costly.

I am also mad at myself for not asserting myself more with certain people. My Midwest mentality overrides common sense; I tend to swallow my bile rather than spit it out – even when it would be soooo psychological purging.  But my training to ‘not stoop’ or ‘set a good example’ is ingrained.

How delicious it would be to return nasty with nasty. I conjure it all the time. But going over to the Dark Side is not the answer.

Everyone has a Shadow side and needs to come to terms with it; it is not a question ‘do I have a Shadow?” it is “where is my Shadow energy right now?” (hopefully not being projected outwards).

I need to get a better grips on my anger before I have an ulcer or heart attack.

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