I don’t seem to be a in good mood this week. Several factors are coming together to put me in the doldrums.  I won’t bore you with the details. The factor with the most sting is the sense of being rejected. I’ve reached out to some friends only to have them say they are busy or not interested.  “Rejection” is perhaps too strong a word to describe the emotion I have. My “Adult” is taking it for what it is viz. friends don’t have time. The the Child feels the sting of rejection.

Despite my pride at being independent, introverted, and having a ‘don’t give a cuss what others think’ attitude, it always stings a bit when I perceive rejection.  One doesn’t have to scratch deep to touch on the archaic.  Humans have the need to feel we are accepted and wanted. We need to feel ‘part of the tribe’.  When my text or calls invites get polite declines or disinterest, the damnable Child complex quickly takes me back to grade school where no one wanted me on their team. Thanks for the reminder.

One of Scruff’s allure is the sense people are looking and/or wanting me for friendship etc. It gives me warm and fuzzy feelings; the sense of being desired.

I will feel better when Someone returns home and I can get caught up with my homework and get back to the gym.  So why am I croaking like something in a swamp?  To let The Wounded Child cry a bit before I slap it and go to bed.

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