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My closet is organized by classwith each section holding its own sort of clothing item. There is a rack for dress shirts, another for trousers, jackets/suits, and bins for shoes, bow ties and the poo-poo undies. The most prominent clothes rack displays my Aloha style shirt collection. Presently there are forty two of them, of which thirty are Spo-shirts. They all hang on wooden hangers – “No Wire Hangers Ever!” for my darlings.

As I am continually making more, this rack is getting full. I’ve come to the inevitable problem – there is no room for more!  What am I to do?  Here are some modest proposals:

Ditch the wooden hangers for wire ones.

Spill over into the relatively empty rack for the suits.

Get rid of the older shirts.

Move the non-Spo-shirts to their own rack.

Move all the shirts to the guestroom closet.

Get some plastic hangers which allow several shirts to hang down from one hook.

A hostile takeover of Someone’s racks.

Stop making shirts.

Send the shirts via CARE packages to the poor people in the Midwest who are starving for colour and fabulous.

Sell the house and get a new one with more closet space.

Get Cubby to start several new Spo-shirt charity tour and this time don’t tell anyone my return address.

Get one of those plastic bag do-hickies that sucks all the air out and compact them all into a box the size of a brick.

Hang them from the ceiling to create a sort of modern artwork and sell it to the Phoenix Art Museum.

Alas, most of these sound impractical or unattractive.  I like them near by to run my fingers over them and admire my industry. They  would be missed if banished  to the guest room closet. And I suspect the loud colours would give Henrik headaches – if ghosts get headaches.

I think I will set up a WordPress-blogger-Ebay and auction off some of the surplus for cash.  Only provision is the highest bidder has to come and pick them up in person.

*Clever-dicks who think ‘order’ or ‘family/genus’ is more apt are itching for a fight.

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August 2012

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