Over breakfast I suddenly announced I am fancying getting a bolo tie. To his credit Someone did not drop his fork or spew his orange juice. The statement astounded me too. Up until then I hadn’t thought of them as something I would purchase.

Living in the Southwest you can’t avoid’em.  They are the ‘official neckwear’ of Arizona – really. I have always associated bolos with a certain type of man and this type of fellow is a cliche neither positive nor desirable: over 70, ‘big boned’, and very conservative. Indeed, as a lad I thought the men who wore them had to because they could not get a proper tie could around their necks.


I have reached that age when it wouldn’t seem too outrageous to have one. Goodness knows where I would wear it. I am not a member of a conservative church.

I suppose the demon in my brain suggesting I purchase one is mostly doing so out of perverse pleasure to see people aghast. This includes the young and liberals on one side and GOPers on the other – nobody would like it.

Of course now that I’ve determined to get one I won’t be able to find any. That happens: as soon as you want something you can’t find it for love or money.  If I was back in MI, bolo ties made out of petoskey stones are readily available.

Someone wants to know if I am going to get ‘something turquoise’ which is code for ‘big jewelry’.  I think something large and over the top is called for, don’t you?


My biggest worry I suppose is donning one only to realize a) I actually like bolo ties and/or b) People think I look good with one.  The former is scary  –  ‘Here goes the start of another collection ($$$)” – and the later suggests I have grown old, beefy, and will soon be supporting the NRA !