I am conducting an experiment on myself. I am seeing how long I can go between cellphone use. On my iphone is an app that records the length of time I am on the phone and how many pickups have occurred. The preliminary data is ominous:
- A lot of my time is spent looking at the thing – 6-8 hours per day.
- I have so many pickups I qualify as a babysitter a disconsolate two year old.
Oh the embarrassment.
I like to imagine myself cognizant and clever but my cellphone consumption makes me feel a chump. I’m ready for my “You are not so smart” podcast interview.
So I have it off or dark; it sits next to me at work. I see the phone lying there, taunting me to come look at it. Don’t you want to see the latest Trump-shenanigan? Facebook has some new posts, come see come see! It reminds me of the poem “Goblin Market” :
“Morning and evening
Maids heard the goblins cry:
“Come buy our orchard fruits,
Come buy, come buy!”
The phone periodically sends out pings and other siren-song noises to alert me ‘something is here” hoping I will drop everything (as is my wont)to find out what just arrived. It makes me aware how I have let technology train me to jump when called. Well I am onto it and will resist and abjure. I am allowing myself an every two hour check in to make sure the world is spinning despite my absence.
I don’t do drugs but I sense my uncomfortable awareness and longing for a look is no different than someone trying to give up smoking or such. The suspense is killing me; I wonder how long it will last.
In theory if I limit my use and not check continually this freed-up time will make me a better person and be less stressed and live longer and the whales will all be saved -or so I hope. Mostly I want to be in control of it and not the other way around.
After I achieve this virtuous goal I think I will eliminate some of the phone apps, starting with the app that records the length of time I am on the phone and how many pickups have occurred. There is some delicious irony to that, no?
31 comments
September 8, 2017 at 1:53 PM
Ron
IPhones are part of our life now. Futile to deny their necessity and convenience. Might as well forsake the modern combustion engine vehicle as a necessary mode of transportation and replace with a horse and buggy. Isn’t really practical unless you’re of the Amish persuasion.
September 8, 2017 at 8:26 PM
Urspo
The Amish are looking more sensible with each day.
I am working on making my phone not my master, merely a gadget. I am walking and eating meals with no cellphone in hand.
September 8, 2017 at 2:12 PM
David
How did we live without smart phones, and to think these devices have only been around a dozen years or so. I understand the designers have employed every psychological tool in the book, to keep us looking at them.
September 8, 2017 at 8:27 PM
Urspo
And it works. Curious that cellphone clients are called ‘users’ not customers. Only other time ‘users’ are applied is with drug doers.
September 8, 2017 at 3:05 PM
Sam
I feel like an adict must feel when I’ve forgotten it.
September 8, 2017 at 8:28 PM
Urspo
Yes
September 8, 2017 at 4:19 PM
Robert
I love that you can turn all of the alerts off, on the computer too!
September 8, 2017 at 8:28 PM
Urspo
It is a godsend. None of my news apps are allowed anymore to send out blares of ‘look at me, a new disaster’ .
September 8, 2017 at 5:12 PM
NIFP
Just imagine how distracting they will be once they can be implanted or otherwise incorporated into our neural network.
September 8, 2017 at 8:30 PM
Urspo
I’ve heard rumors. I will pass on this one.
September 8, 2017 at 5:15 PM
anne marie in philly
I am damn glad I don’t have one of those fucking things! 🙂
September 8, 2017 at 8:30 PM
Urspo
Once again you are quite the sensible woman.
September 8, 2017 at 7:31 PM
Dave
The tenth anniversary of the introduction of the iPhone occurs next Tuesday in Cupertino CA in what amounts to a holy ceremony in the new billion dollar Apple corporate headquarter’s ‘Steve Jobs Auditorium’. I should be ashamed that I can report this in such detail, given the fact that I believe the responsibility for the destruction of civilization will fall on Jobs’ shoulders rather than donald trump’s. BTW, I own an iPhone, and will be buying a new one next week.
September 8, 2017 at 8:31 PM
Urspo
I hope you will allow me to text you from time to time to see what you are up to and to be a general nuisance.
September 8, 2017 at 9:06 PM
Dave
Texts, absolutely, but you may not take the title ‘General Nuisance’ from me.
September 8, 2017 at 10:30 PM
Urspo
I am glad to text you to assist in your guidance
September 8, 2017 at 7:53 PM
Old Lurker
I applaud this experiment. But Travel David is correct; this is not your fault. These devices are intentionally designed to psychologically manipulate you and consume as much of your attention as possible. If nothing else the principle of intermittent reward is at play.
Turn off your notifications and ringtones for everything except essentials (calls from Someone, emergencies from the office, etc). Keep working at ignoring your phone for longer and longer stretches of time, as if it is a squalling newborn adjusting to its new sleep schedule. You can do it!
September 8, 2017 at 8:32 PM
Urspo
Today’s efforts were good. I had it off while I was seeing patients and not picking it up to check on things when it made chirping noises. Every two hours I would check it only to find the world had kept spinning really no different than before. fascinating.
September 8, 2017 at 8:24 PM
truthspew
My pet name for my phone is the Electronic Leash. Seriously – texts of “Where are you?
and such. And Emails from political entities, youtube, etc. And yeah I turn off all beeps, bloops and notifications on my phone too – except for texts and phone calls. I also judiciously employ a call blocker that blocks anything that isn’t in my contacts list. It’s cut down on the Rachel from Card Services bullshit so I’m good with that.
September 8, 2017 at 8:33 PM
Urspo
I suspect you of all people have the tech-gadgets in their proper place.
September 8, 2017 at 8:51 PM
truthspew
Well yeah – must haves are bluetooth headphones. I mostly use them for the quality of sound but to also prevent people coming up to me to ask stupid questions. I don’t know what it is, but people can clearly see I’ve got headphones on and they try talking to me.
September 8, 2017 at 10:16 PM
Practical Parsimony
I just gpt an Android from Samsung/ATT. However, I still have the flip phone. In a month, my cost for both will be $65, much less than most people pay for one. The android chips when it is off and I am asleep. I hate that. I do nothing on it but watch weather maps for my area, search grocery ads, and shopkick to make money. NO ONE knows the number, not even me. I am glad to know I can stop the noises and alerts on the Android!
I panic when I leave my cellphone at home because I cannot walk anywhere if the car has a problem. Everyone knows I hate texting! So, I get few. Doctors do text me a reminder on the flip phone, and I do appreciate that.
So far, the cell and android serve me. I am not addicted at all. However, that could change at any time. I do love to talk on the phone and did so when I only had a landline.
September 8, 2017 at 10:29 PM
Urspo
Good points all. Good for you to set limits on your android.
September 10, 2017 at 1:03 AM
Practical Parsimony
I really don’t know how to use it very well…lol. I have to stop kids in stores and ask them what to do next!
September 9, 2017 at 6:36 AM
fearsomebeard
Fortunately I am not on facebook or any social media. All notifications are off and I rarely use it except for client calls and client texts. I use the landline for my mom and family. I limit e mail to when I am seated in front of my laptop two times a day. It amazes me how many people even walk glued to their phone screen. There is a world out there, turn off the noise and enjoy it.
September 9, 2017 at 8:31 AM
Urspo
It is no wonder why you are so happy and content in life.
September 9, 2017 at 12:49 PM
Steven
I love the quiet hours feature on my cell phone. All alerts are silenced. Text messages are silenced, but it gives my inner circle of people (husband, parents, in-laws) the ability to come through by responding to my “auto away text” by typing “knock knock”. Then their original text gets through. All telephone calls are silenced except for my inner circle as well. Thankfully I have never allowed a cell phone to overtake my life.
September 9, 2017 at 6:39 PM
Urspo
Sensible fellow
September 10, 2017 at 5:08 PM
larrymuffin
I find the use of the word ”Pickups” intriguing. It has other connotations unrelated to technology, just saying.
September 10, 2017 at 8:22 PM
Urspo
How would you know this? Is there some nuance from the French of which I know not?
September 11, 2017 at 11:09 AM
larrymuffin
LOL!!! you are too clever for words.