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The APA Secret Police recently sent me an email hoping I will have a good autumn. In it they reminded me there are 47 ways for a AZ physician to be ‘unprofessional’ . [1] The email didn’t tell me what these faux pas were, so I had to look them up. I was quite curious what they could be.

Most of them turned out to be obvious  no-brainers. They were on top, perhaps in case if a physician is only going to read part way he/she should at least view the most important ones.

I should not have sex with my patients; I shouldn’t prescribe oxycodone to my relations. That leaves 45 to go.

I admit I was disappointed find no obscure laws of the type that make you wonder how on earth did they get there in the first place. I’ve been told it is illegal here in AZ to carry ice cream cones in your back pocket; I didn’t see anything similar about being a proper doctor.  There were some no-nos about chelation therapy but these were more about telling patients it doesn’t work rather than trying it for constipation or something.

Happily there is nothing about rolling down grass hills or having to know from memory the counties in Arizona. [2] I was also relieved to see no fashion felonies that forbid me donning my Spo-shirts on Fridays.

The last one, dear #47 is about practicing medicine under a false name. Calling me “Dr. Spo” may be putting me in legal jeopardy. If I am dragged away by the APA Secret Police I will argue while laughter is the best medicine Spo-fans who address me so are patients but blogger-buddies. I am going to tell my patients to stop referring to me as “Space ghost”.


[1] – The D.O.s have 49.

[2] – There are 15 counties; some of them larger than the State of Rhode Island.




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