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In a jovial mood Someone reached out to me this morning while we were brushing our buckies to bump his fist with mine. As I moved in for contact I shouted “Wonder Twin powers, activate!”  He stiffened and drew back his fist puzzled at this unrecognized ejaculation.  I explained.  For Spo-fans like Someone ignorant of The Wonder Twins they are a “B” level set of super heroes. When this set of twins bump their fists one of them transforms into an animal while the other turns into some form of water.  I forget which one does what. I remember as a boy thinking neither power seemed that ‘super’ and the one who turns into a waterfall or a snow cone got the short end of the carrot.

As suppose most boys (and girls too?) fantasize about having superpowers usually disguised by some drab personae. I don’t recall doing so.* I suppose it was because I was not a fighter or believed in my own masculinity. I am now reassessing my inner-secret powers and wondering what they may be. It seems super heroes have proliferated since my youth; it seems all the super abilities are taken and copyrighted leaving me with nothing, like coming to a garage sale after all the good stuff’s been taken.  Perhaps I can pick and choose from the pantheon to make a Chimera of powers.  Super-Spo shoud have the following:

The body of The Sub Mariner

The flying ability of Superman

The chapeau of Thor

The weather control abilities of Storm**

The accessories of Wonder Woman (including tiara)

The buttocks of Robin the Boy Wonder

The package of the Incredible Hulk***

Having super powers probably means I am obliged to fight for the right. I just can’t walk up and down the streets of Palm Springs like Musetta having all swoon and drool over my attributes.  I suppose I could be a super-villain rather; they seem to have all the fun anyway.  I daresay I would make a disappointing bad guy as I don’t care to take over the world or have all of Oz kiss my feet.  I guess I have to settle with my rapier wit, writing style, and keen knowledge base to get me through. It doesn’t make for good comic book or Marvel movie material but I guess it’s enough for cocktail conversation and supper invite.

Post script – A Spo-fan (the dear!) texted me on this topic to clarify a few things:

If you have super powers and uses them for good/fight evil this makes you a super hero. Storm qualifies for such.

The Wonder Twins are Jayna and Zan; Zan is the one who turns into water forms.

You don’t have have original or unique super powers – just need to be original how you use them.  

1099823

 

*For me, I wanted to be like Samantha or one of her ilk from “Bewitched”.  No flying, fighting, or capes needed.

**Storm is not a super hero per se but an X-man character. Please don’t write in.

***There goes our G-rating. TBDHSR will be most upset.

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