Pensive

Once in a while all I want to do is close the door and withdraw from the world. Today is one of those days. I wish I had something important or amusing to write but I do not. I had a few ‘back up’ posts but I discovered in my rounds today many of my blogger buddies had ‘written it first’ so to publish my own would look like copy-catting. I am vain that way. 

Earlier today I wrote a piece about my colonoscopy this morning. Then I rewrote it only to erase it entirely. * I’ve felt slow and dimwitted all day, the result of having had no sleep and anesthesia. I am also feeling melancholic for a handful of reasons: I’ve learned of a trouble at work; the politics of the land are appalling; I missed a friend’s birthday. The list is longer than this but you get the gist. 

There is some loneliness happening as well. There are a handful of folks I would love to reach out to me but they are away busy I guess.  My telepathic powers emanating ‘please call or text me for I want to hear from you” must have been damaged while under the influence of the ketamine. 

I hope to feel better after I’ve slept and had a few real meals. I have two days to cheer up before Brother #4 arrives. Hector the yard man comes on Wednesday to tidy up the weeds that have grown quick as triffids in the recent rains. The house is as clean as it has been in a long while; I’m half-tempted to cancel on them jus to keep things tidy for as long as possible.

I was glad to get caught up with blog reads and see nearly  everyone is doing well enough.  

Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

 

*For thems interested: it went OK.