iuThe men-folk around these parts don’t wear much pants. What I means is few wear long trousers other when they have to like going to work. Otherwise they walk about in public in gym or cargo shorts. These are never ‘tight’ but often looking so roomy as to resemble badly-built kilts. This informal attire is seen even in the ‘best places’: it may be a swanky restaurant but no long trousers ever. * The explanations for the fashion are simple enough: it is too damn hot to wear long pants and men tend to wear what the other guys are wearing. All the same I can’t help but wonder if there is an unconscious slowly-shaping rebellion developing towards the termination of trousers. Pants are usually uncomfortable (especially dress slacks). They tend to pinch the yarbles making for a continual need for self-adjustment often needing doing in public and hopefully passed off as just looking for something in my pocket. 

Urs Truly tends to walk around the house in his boxers (Derek Rose is you are asking) keeping at the ready some quick slip-on cargo shorts in case the doorbell rings and he has to attend to the JWs or the Scouts selling cookies. That said I like cargo shorts when I have to put on something as they are loose, familiar, and easily assessed – like my men.  I once read few men thought about cargo shorts as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ until some NYT female fashion plate lamented cargos were ‘over’ and ladies tell your men to be rid of them. This went over like a lead balloon and now they are won’t be given up without a court order.  If there’s going to be an androsartorial revolution it must be from within. I think a lot of men would vote for no pants and more kilts** if we could just publicly admit to this Emperor’s new clothes matter – pun intended. No doubt Pat Robertson (who is always seen in a suit) would bellow this as a satanic threat to masculinity and raise a caterwaul against returning to the historical and traditional use of robes, kilts, and – yes – dresses.***

Meanwhile it remains 40-45C outside La Casa de Spo and inside it is 30C so trousers be damned. I like being in touch with my inner-Dionysus who was a fellow never found of pants in the first place. My brothers and I grew up with the silly statement “You put your pants on and face the facts!” We still don’t know what it means exactly but it does convey pants are funny things and one is better off without them really. 


*In preparation of this entry Urs Truly has done a lot of ‘in the field’ research looking at men’s pants etc.

**I want to call them skirts but we need to fight one war at a time here. “Kilts’ sounds less threatening than ‘skirts’ although I fail to see the difference. I’ve learned not to ask a kilt-wearer as he becomes flustered in his inability to tell me and he then he hits me. 

***Come to think of which some of the worse patriarchies abjure pants for robes: Orthodox and Catholic church leaders, the KKK, and members of the Supreme Court. I wouldn’t be surprised Mr. Robertson has several frocks of his own.