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A sometimes recommendation to writers is to ‘write what you know about’ or ‘write what you are experiencing”, but what if what’s happening isn’t good? Do readers really want to know about your woes? Blogging is first and foremost a diary of sorts, a means to record events. Patients dealing with difficult matters are often encouraged to write about them, to help collect thoughts and work through emotions. So I will do likewise.*

I have lost health insurance; I will have no coverage this year. I discovered this when I asked about signing up for such and I was told I had missed the deadline. It was last month when I was distracted with work and Christmas and such. The House Manager checked with The Overlords, who told her no, I can’t sign up; I had missed the deadline. I was recommended to ‘try to find some outside insurance’ perhaps. With pre-existing conditions fat chance of that.

I admit my mind is reeling with worry with the what-ifs and the worse-case scenarios. This is America; if you don’t have insurance and if you can’t afford healthcare you go without. You avoid doctor appointments and stop taking meds, or at least ‘ration them’ as my patients often tell me. The main matter for me is my medication. I take several that are vital for my well-being and some of them are expensive – obscenely so. This weekend I have to figure out what to do about them. I figure there is leverage to save money by stopping contributions to my 401K, discontinuing some subscriptions (like meal kits), and canceling all 2022 travel plans, to shift funds to pay for prescriptions. I was hoping for a new car and glasses this year; these will be canceled. The Good Doctor wanted me to see a nephrologist but without means to cover the probable tests and recommendations, I won’t be going.

Yesterday I wrote about the notion of applying ‘good” to all events. I admit I am not finding anything good about this one. However, there may be some ‘good’ in time. I have long wanted to have a budget, to know where our expenses are going and how we are doing. The situation may force a come-to-the-lord sit down and look at our expenses. I keep in mind I have income; the medications can be covered at exorbitant cost, but it won’t be impossible.

I claim to follow the philosophy of stoicism that has at its heart the notion bad things happen but somehow you will get through it. I’ve had more Armageddons than I have teeth; I recognize one when it happens to me. I’ve survived all of them, so chances are I will get through this one too. 2022 will be a frugal one, without frills but that’s happened before too.

Fingers crossed now I don’t get sick or I have to go to hospital or resort to stopping meds. It would be an irony of sorts to have survived sixty years only to succumb not from sickness but from lack of resources.

*The last time I titled an entry ‘Bad News” I had discovered large dark spot on my back, and thought it was cancer. This turned out to be not so. There is a silly superstition if I title this entry likewise, it will work out OK as well.

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