I didn’t get to watch last night’s presidential debacle debate because The Board of Directors Here at Spo-reflections dropped by unannounced Spanish Inquisition style to discuss their own state of the union. Normally I hear (and smell) them coming and bar the door, but I had my guard down – ironically because I was engrossed reading a vague but menacing email from The APA Secret Police.* Oh the pain. They wrapped me up in a wet blanket and carried me off to Heorot Johnsons III for an hour of reprimand. Why am I slacking? Why am failing to meet my contractual obligation to write often and write funny? Ratings are down they complained, and comments are lean. Blogger-buddies are missing in action. If I don’t shape up pronto, they are considering ‘encore’ postings (viz. reruns) or hiring SassyBear (or someone like him) to take over. Shape up or there will be Helle to pay. My explanation of being up to my oxters with work fell on deaf ears. At the end of their Teutonic tirade they showed me some freshly-pointed sticks usually used for spitting joints of meat. They also showed me some Donny and Marie CDs. I promised to shape up and they brought me back to La Casa de Spo, with no loss of digits.
This weekend I will go to the office. It will be empty and without distraction. I can put the kettle on and some soft music (not Donny and Marie) and spend a few hours getting things done. It’s a lousy way to spend a Saturday but there it is. The payoff is I will be caught up – temporarily – enough to finally have time to blogs and scribble out proper entries (no rubbish types like this one). TBDHSR will be appeased – temporarily – no pointed sticks will be necessary, neither will CDs from the 70s.
*This morning they sent this email:
‘We conduct a monthly audit to identify medical prescribers who fail to request a patient utilization report before prescribing certain medications and communicate non-compliance to the appropriate licensing boards for further investigation.’
This must have elicited quite the orchestra of scorched cats for this evening they wrote another:
‘We apologize for any concern this particular announcement may have caused you. This is strictly for information purposely only and does not indicate you are non-compliant with statute requirements.’
29 comments
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June 28, 2024 at 6:30 AM
Debra She Who Seeks
NO, NO! Not Donny & Marie! Who knew Vikings could be so cruel?
June 28, 2024 at 6:52 AM
Urspo
B-stards they are but it’s a bluff; their CD player doesn’t work and they haven’t a clue how the entertainment center works. However they are quite skilled with pointed sticks so I got the point ho ho ho
June 28, 2024 at 7:07 AM
Robzilla
Count me as one person who’d rather listen to Donny & Marie than those doddering idiots who are too old to ru(i)n this country.
June 28, 2024 at 7:19 AM
Urspo
At least their lyrics make grammatical sense.
June 28, 2024 at 8:01 AM
spwilcen
APA – bumble-headed twits? Doubtless from a non-medical staffer feeling fat with ego.
June 28, 2024 at 9:00 AM
Urspo
The APA Secret Police isn’t wrong: we are supposed to check the Controlled Substances Monitoring System every time we write a Rx for such meds. Signs ‘we ain’t doing it” means we are not doing our job right. The vague but menacing email should have been better worded; serves them right to get a flurry of emails and calls from hysterical prescribers.
June 29, 2024 at 5:43 AM
spwilcen
Seems some doofus made a big mistake blanketing practitioners NOT guilty. It’s a high school, military-style grand faux pas – punishing all for the transgressions of one or a few. Shame, shame.
June 28, 2024 at 9:22 AM
Mistress Borghese
You didn’t miss much….it was the train wreck one would expect. A shame we are faced with these two candidates. We the people need to have better and deserve to have better and more choices. Biden is a swell man….but I do wonder if he has the stamina for four more years. Last night made me more worried with fret with anything else.
June 28, 2024 at 11:52 AM
Urspo
I miss you however. I plan on stopping by for a catch up this weekend.
June 28, 2024 at 10:54 AM
Old Lurker
Instead of the Osmonds maybe next time TBDHSR will treat you to the Partridge Family? Maybe the Jackson Five?
I do hope you please Athena of the flashing eyes soon. She is a demanding diety, it seems.
It hardly seems appropriate for the APA Secret Police to be sending you ominous emails. That is a sure way to blow their cover.
June 28, 2024 at 11:55 AM
Urspo
I am getting familiar with Athena and hope this just gets easier in time as all the patients are ‘tucked in’ with their information and such. This will probably take ~ 3 months to cycle through everyone.
I don’t mind The Partridge Family. I have their Christmas album. I’ve learned not to play it out loud lest others with pointed sticks react accordingly.
June 28, 2024 at 2:27 PM
Anonymous
The first paragraph of today’s post has got to be the most hilarious and well-written thing you have ever written!
Keep it up.
Practical Parsimony
June 28, 2024 at 3:11 PM
Urspo
I am happy to make you laugh
Your comment made my day; thank you!
June 28, 2024 at 4:31 PM
Robert
I apologise for being slack in not reading blogs for the last few weeks. Thank goodness I’m doing a round-robin now.
June 30, 2024 at 1:24 PM
Urspo
I will be at yours anon.
June 28, 2024 at 6:16 PM
jefferyrn
I had trouble reading you post in my email. The pictures made a mess of it. It fixed itself in the reader I am using now. Don’t work too hard. They will come to expect it. Hmmm that almost sounds sexual.
June 30, 2024 at 1:24 PM
Urspo
I have heard this before: photos mucking up the email.
worse luck that.
June 28, 2024 at 8:39 PM
BadNoteB
The early arriving heat has prompted severe bouts of lethargy, lazy and cranky in our household this year. Additionally, I’ve noted cosmic activity prompting unseasonal busy-ness demanding time and energy we’re just too exhausted to provide. Such conditions not only resulted in breakage of a 287-day Wordle solution streak (how the hell could I skip one day’s puzzle?) but also have contributed to a huge backlog in reading/responding to my favorite blog posts… Please pass this on to TBDHSR in defense of lagging stats and MIA readership!
June 30, 2024 at 1:25 PM
Urspo
Summer time and the living ought to be easy. Or so I hope.
June 29, 2024 at 1:21 AM
Hugh W. Roberts
I rather liked going into an empty office, especially if the right security guard was on duty.
June 30, 2024 at 1:26 PM
Urspo
There is a security guard there who seems a bit sweet on me. I asked him if it was OK for me to be there on Saturday; he didn’t take this as an indirect speech object to come by.
June 29, 2024 at 2:28 AM
Moving with Mitchell
How could you post that image of Donnie? I feel ill!
June 30, 2024 at 1:26 PM
Urspo
Have you seen what he looks like lately? That makes me feel ill.
June 29, 2024 at 3:50 AM
Michael
Sometimes life gets in the way and it is hard to keep up with blogs. I truly understand that!
June 30, 2024 at 1:27 PM
Urspo
I pop by yours this Sunday.
June 29, 2024 at 4:34 AM
David Godfrey
Oh the pain, the night I bought my first stereo, I bought the first original Donny Osmond album. The one with his prepubescent face on the cover.
Overworked. Part of the software transition should have been, transfering all of the data from the old system to the new system. Either software that moves it, or a rent a geek, spends hours in copy and paste mode. The cursed software company probably wanted to charge extra for this service.
June 30, 2024 at 1:28 PM
Urspo
Regardless it didn’t happen so I have to do this stuff now. In 6 months my future self will be thankful to my present self for doing the work.
June 29, 2024 at 5:03 AM
Ron
OMG! Not Donny and Marie albums! What’s next? Robert Goulet?
June 30, 2024 at 1:28 PM
Urspo
I don’t think I have ever heard any songs by Mr. Goulet; I ought to look him up.