Perros sin sal

Today is Valentine’s Day of course and Puerto Vallarta is bedecked with heart shaped balloons.  Glass hearts, in red and pink, hang from strings and blow in the wind. Someone finds these spinning hearts unsettling, giving a new twist on the expression “Be still my heart”.

I am not interested in heart-shaped souvenirs; I want a Smurf T-Shirt. When we arrived to PV I was in a daze. I remember walking past countless Tienda del Souvenirs, many with a T-shirt of Papa Smurf as pictured.  A few days later I fancied getting one for Jim,T.P.T.**  Damned if I can find one now. Like a red light when you want one, as soon as the object is desired it dodges you. Now it is a matter of principle. I am determined to get this silly thing. Unfortunately my Spanish is not sufficient to properly ask “Where is Papa Smurf on steroids?” without making it sound like the Dirty Hungarian Sketch from Monty Python.

Truth be told, other than food and drink, I have not purchased anything. I feel obliged in a way to get some trinket to memorialize the week. If Papa Smurf was a figment of a dissociative state then I will have to settle on something more tasteful like a T-Shirt simply saying “Puerto Vallarta”.  

I suggested to Someone he get himself a sombrero. Calling my bluff, he said he would only if I wore it on the airplane. Bluffing his bluff I said yes.  Ah love.

**The Personal Trainer.