I pulled the handle of the slot machine that is in my mind and came up with nothing. Slot machines (so I read) were designed to keep the molls busy while the Las Vegas barons plotted their machinations. The notion of sitting for hours in front of a slot machine and pulling a lever and feeding it coins sounds terribly tedious. On the other hand I find it amusing to watch people playing slot machines. This is infinitely cheaper as entertainment.
Thems who play slots (is there a proper term for this sort of person?) seem to be mostly elderly women, most of them smokers. There are a few with walkers and (oh dear!) oxygen machines. I would think the last place on earth to be if you have COPD is a smoke-filled casino. These ancient vestals often sit 2-3 chairs away from each other. At first I thought this a Midwestern thing for personal space but I learned it is because most of them are playing 2-3 machines at a time: the one in front of her and the ones on each side. “That’s my machine” they say menacingly in a hoarse basso voice as I try to sit down next to them.
Gambling is based on the psychology of intermittent positive reinforcement stimulating a release of dopamine in the brain. This works well for most. I have a neurotic sensation someone in the surveillance department is laughing as I lose; this overrides my enjoyment of gambling and dampers the dopamine like a dead rat. My WASP upbringing still thinks gambling a vice something to avoid, like loose women, cards, social dancing, and reading Balzac.
Sometimes when Someone is gambling I buy a drink and sit and survey the surroundings. My favorite location is near the ATM which some play as often as the slot machines and with about as much payoff. I shouldn’t be entertained by someone with a gambling problem depleting his bank account for his habit, but there it is.
I am still waiting for the slot machine that is my mind it “pay off”. What I wait for is some fabulous erudite topic to come tumbling out upon which I can write a post worthy of a Mahler symphony. So far no such luck. Perhaps I should move to a different machine or take up smoking.
24 comments
November 17, 2016 at 1:54 AM
Old Lurker
The thought of endlessly refreshing my email/bloglist, feeding it my attention and looking for dopamine hits also sounds incredibly tedious, but I do so anyways. I wish I had a Midwestern upbringing to keep me in check.
One of the things I love about Spo-reflections is that you blog about such a wide variety of topics. There are rhythms but they do not get tedious.
November 17, 2016 at 7:09 AM
Urspo
I thank you very much for the compliment. You are a dear.
November 17, 2016 at 2:23 AM
mitchellismoving
I wish Jerry’s WASP upbringing made him think the way you do… The only thing he avoided was loose women!
November 17, 2016 at 7:10 AM
Urspo
Oh, but he should try one just for the experience. Choose one well over four feet and please don’t feed her buns and things.
November 17, 2016 at 10:32 AM
becomingmenaturally
I for one agree with Anne Marie. I hate casinos and they make me nervouse..all those people putting all that money in. But as the saying goes not my monkey not my parade. I will let just keep putting My extra change and bills in my giant water bottle. 100% payout. And Anne Marie we will have to get our areas of Philly together and have lunch some dat
November 17, 2016 at 4:39 AM
David
I’d suggest setting up shop down the street from a casino and treating gambling addiction, but the addicts would be less likely to pay for your services.
So what sorts of adult entertainment does you Midwestern upbringing allow?
November 17, 2016 at 7:13 AM
Urspo
I don’t have many patients with gambling problems; they tend to go to GA not to psychiatrists. I see gambling as payback for Native America – we gave’em booze and they gave us gambling issues. hohoho
As for your question: cow-tipping.
November 17, 2016 at 2:15 PM
anne marie in philly
moooooooooooo!
November 17, 2016 at 4:49 AM
anne marie in philly
those that play the casinos in PA and NJ resemble that photo above; pathetic, sad losers. I cannot enter a casino due to (a) smoking upsets my asthma, and (b) gambling is for losers.
November 17, 2016 at 7:17 AM
Urspo
They are ‘losers’ that in the long run the house is going to win.
Someone has the right attitude: he puts aside so many dollars that he sees as the price of entertainment at a casino. If he wins, fine. But if he loses, it is only so much as the price of admission.
November 17, 2016 at 7:02 PM
David
That is my style, it must come with the name.
November 17, 2016 at 7:05 AM
fearsomebeard
I think your inner slot machine paid off as this is a wonderful post. Every slot machine has a theme and I’m already dreaming up the Spo Themed machine.
November 17, 2016 at 7:18 AM
Urspo
Thank you
There are highway ads for the local casinos boasting ‘the loosest slots in town”. I think a Spo-slot machine should be an easy payoff, like a gumball machine – you put something in and I put something out.
November 17, 2016 at 2:16 PM
anne marie in philly
heh heh heh, you said “put out”! ;-b
November 17, 2016 at 1:23 PM
Darkness | Fearsome Beard
[…] blogger just posted about playing the slots. This week when I pulled my one arm bandit’s handle […]
November 17, 2016 at 3:54 PM
Kato
I hate the feeling of desperation that so often occurs around poker machines especially when individuals are playing in their own private little bubble.
Admission… it is fun when you win. And it can become mesmorising. More reasons for me to stay well clear of them.
November 17, 2016 at 3:56 PM
Friko
Whatever you do, slotteries are not the answer. Joining the slottering brigade will never do.Think of your WASP upbringing.
November 17, 2016 at 7:39 PM
Urspo
I think too much of my WASP upbringing if only to keep it from ruling the roost.
November 17, 2016 at 5:30 PM
Erik Rubright
I was never one for gambling. Paying for insurance is bad enough a gamble.
November 17, 2016 at 7:38 PM
Urspo
Indeed.
November 17, 2016 at 7:05 PM
Doug
It’s certainly got me thinking. What do I hope will happen when I pay to play? I’ll think more about that.
November 17, 2016 at 7:38 PM
Urspo
I like to encourage thought and self-reflection.
November 23, 2016 at 4:11 AM
Ron
Last year, while in Niagara Falls, Pat wanted to play ” the slots.” Thus was a first for both of us. We quickly dispensed of the $20 we limited ourselves to playing with. This year Pat wanted to “hit the slots” again during our annual visit to the Canadian side of Niagara Falls. I just could not bring myself to pull the lever. Pat played. When he was $9.00 ahead I urged him to quite “while he was ahead.” He did. We exited and will never return again. To me gambling is a seductive evil. I would rather be swinging from the chandeliers nude.
December 10, 2016 at 3:21 PM
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